A Simple Hug

I went to the chiro yesterday, and he really pointed out some awesome things.

But I have to back up a little bit here, only for those who may be newer to my random ramblings.

I've battled with my weight for my whole life.

My. Whole. Life.

Do you realize, that I was never (for as long as I can remember) an acceptable weight.  Even when I was running all the time, and not eating nearly enough (yeah, I figured out why I was dizzy all the fucking time back then....double workouts, not eating enough, and running a shit ton will do that to you) I was not an acceptable weight.

But, well...what is acceptable?  When I got down to 180, I wanted to lose more.  I always thought that I would magically know when I hit that magical weight that would make me happy.

But I didn't.  I kept striving for more, pushing for more, and feeling like crap.

Something had to give.

Fast forward to now.  I'm right around 230.  Yep.  I put it out there for all of you.  230 pounds. Sometimes, I feel like such a fucking failure when I look at it that way.  I think about how big I've gotten all the time now.  But then again, when I was smaller, I kept thinking about how much smaller I could get.

My. Weight. My. Whole. Life.

I have gained 50 freaking pounds since I over-exercised and under-ate my way to my smallest. And that was my problem.  I wanted to be as small as possible.

Fuck that.

Can you believe that now I physically feel better than I have in ages?  I can deadlift 285 on a straight bar without a belt, 315 on a trap bar.  I can front squat 170.  I feel like that is some decent weight.

I'm lifting heavier than ever before, moving some awkward objects in strongman training, and feeling better than ever.  Seems kind of crazy, doesn't it?

The chiro commented about how I'm changing my body.  My ribs were good, my back was good.  My neck needed some adjusting, as well as my hips, but compared to six months ago, I feel completely different.  I feel freaking fabulous.  (I better knock on some wood, so I don't jinx myself.)

Before I left, he stopped to give me a hug, to congratulate me on my success.  He said I'm making my body better; that I had  not only evolved in the past, but that I continue to evolve and improve myself.

That simple hug meant the world to me today.

Race To Anyplace

Once again, I've sucked at keeping up this blog.  I always have these ideas about what to write about, but then once I'm sitting in front of my computer at home, I get sucked in to other things.

Ugh.

Anyways, today is a quickie.  On Sunday, March 1, I'm participating in a Race to Anyplace to help raise money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.

I've participated in one of these a couple of years ago, and it was such fun.  Teams "race to anyplace" in a five-hour stationary bike race.  Each team has 12 riders, who alternate riding every 15 minutes. There are two goals: be the team with the most mileage at the end, and be the team that raises the most money.

I'll be doing my part in pedaling my little heart out each time I'm on that bike for 15 minutes.

But I need your help to reach that second goal!

Please visit my fundraising page to help me reach my personal goal of raising $250.  Every little bit helps, and your donation will help fund treatments that save lives every day.

I really appreciate any help you can offer, and thank you in advance for your generosity!  I know, as well as you, that a dollar simply does not stretch as far as it used to.  So if you find that you have a couple extra bucks and can make a donation towards this cause, I truly do appreciate it.

And a super-huge-ginormous THANK YOU to those who have already donated!